We weren't lost. We just hadn't found this river yet.
A field note on exploration, uncertainty, and finding unexpected things.
On a particularly sunny day in the New Forest, we were perched on a picnic bench, chowing down a Tesco meal deal and fending off the wild ponies. Parked to our right was a camper van, it's owners, it would seem, meticulously setting up an entire mobile restaurant.
Of all the details I noticed was a bumper sticker that read "We're not lost. We're exploring". Which was really rather apt for what the afternoon would hold.
We drove on and parked up outside Hatchet Pond near Brockenhurst and meandered along a somewhat clear path into the woods. My three boys in tow, we settled into a nice pace through the woods.
At some point, after we'd wandered for longer than my kids had the patience for, I stopped to get my bearings. My kids were convinced we were lost. To be fair, we were quite deep into the New Forest at this point, on a path that had gradually stopped being a path and started being a dense woodland, thick with trees. And nettles. Lots of nettles.
I maintained, as many parents do, with the calm authority of someone who had absolutely no idea where we were, that we were exploring. Parents, I've discovered, are remarkably good at projecting confidence in situations that would benefit more from competence, or maybe that's just me.
We trudged on a little further to see the trees open up and this lovely river-narrowing appear.
The boys were relieved, so was I to be honest. As we sat and refuelled – it's crazy how much kids eat – we enjoyed the scene for a little while. An overturned boat that once had been green, clearly unused for years, provided a welcome seat.
Two ruddy shelducks (I think that's what they are) pottered in the water ignoring the four of us standing on the bank arguing about whether we were lost. And of course, I took a photo. And made a note about the whole thing in my notebook.
We weren't lost.
We just hadn't found this river yet.
I think about that distinction when I feel a little confused and uncertain in life.
Lost implies you had somewhere specific to be - and you are not there, but you don't know where you are.
Exploring means you're open to wherever you end up.
They can look identical from the outside – same woods, same missing path, same panicking children – but they feel completely different from the inside.
| Lost | Exploring |
|---|---|
| Wrong place | Unexpected place |
| Anxiety | Curiosity |
| Fixed destination | Open possibility |
| Failure | Discovery |
Some of the best things I've found, in life and work, have been from exploring. Exploration isn't always in pursuit of something specific. It can often be the discovery of something interesting you never knew existed.
Some of the best new features, products, ideas, careers, jobs and services come about from true exploration. But only if we find time, space, energy and attention to explore in the first place and not mistake exploration for being lost.
It's difficult to discover anything new if you insist on arriving exactly where you planned. Looking back, I suspect I've spent a lot of my life confusing exploration for being lost.
The river had been there all along.
We simply hadn't found it yet.
Where this sits in the Atlas
Orientation·Idea to Value·Communication·Creativity & Climate·Learning
